FAM!
These past couple of weeks have torn my heart left and right. This contact we had yesterday explains it all, "My son only told you guys you could come by another time so that you woulldnt feel bad, ps. we have one of your books of mormon sitting in in our house collecting dust, could i give that back to you." Ahhh. I felt like someone was breaking up with me. It is the honest truth, i have never felt so disanimated in my entire mission until now. We always get rejected but i have been taking it so personal lately and have just been feeling so such sadness for the people who are missing out on these blessings we are trying to give them. How can hearts be so hard that they look at two smiling gringas outside their door and then slam it in their face? They dont know just how valuable our message is. And then I think about the people who have had this treasure in their life and then they threw it away for temporary happiness.
I have never prayed harder to find the chosen people, i have fought harder to have a more pure and patient love for my companion and I have never felt so much power testifying of my my Savior Jesus Christ. Maybe even if the people I was testifying to didnt feel anything, I did and i cant deny what i have felt!
Conferance was so powerful. I had a lot of questions going into it but to resume them all into one it would be, how can i trust God in the promised blessings He has for me if i do all that i can, and then how can i be patient in waiting to recieve those blessings. I learned two new things from Elder Renlunds talk small acts of faith are required to ignite Gods promises, i cant go crazy asking, "how much more can i do?" and smaller blessings are given to us while waiting for the bigger ones.
I have literally felt God lift me during this change, I am training a new american missionary and opening a new sector so i have been having to do a lot of things on my own due to the language barrior my compaion has (but shes doing great)! Its really scary at times and really tiring but ive never felt alone. Heavenly Father has put at least one receptive person in our path each day to help me have the faith to keep going.
Our biggest miracle has been Soñia. We met her knocking on a members door. She is the housekeeper of the member. We asked her if we could enter and sing her a song because she said she was having a rough day. My companion sings very silent so it was basically a solo, it went awful (if youve ever heard my voice you know) but she felt the spirit so strong and agreed to let us teach her about forever families and how she could be with her son again, he had died just one month before. After a couple weeks of visiting her she is now on the path of repentance. She went from smoking 7 ciggarettes a day to now only 3 in a week! She has SO MUCH DESIRE to become new again through CHRIST. She has definitely been our biggest miracle and I feel so blessed to be able to be an instrument in Gods hands with Sonia.
I know these things are true, my heart hurts to see people reject or fall away because I how much joy these things can bring to someones life just as they have brought to mine! I extend the same invitation as Profet Nelson do the spiritual work to find out for yourselves. God knows you, hears your prayers and will answer you!I testify that President Nelson is called by God to lead and guide our church. I know that Jesus Christ directs this church! And I know that families are forever, i cant wait to see my forever family in a few weeks ;)
I love you all more than you know!
Hermana Pulsipher
The best pic I could get with my comp, Spa day with the zone, and my cute niece ;)
